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Are You Giving Yourself Back Pain?

Here are 18 daily activities you can do to give yourself neck or back pain:

Back Pain1.) Be sure to stay in the same position, any position, for extremely long periods of time. Remember, don’t move a muscle.

2.) When buying a car, choose one that has bucket seats, and one where the headrest is at least 5 inches forward of the back of the seat. This forces your head to be thrust forward whenever you drive and your back to be shaped like a ‘C’.

3.) When you’re standing, make sure you slouch your head and shoulders far forward while doing your tasks.

4.) Always use the BLT technique for lifting: BLT bend, lift, twist, to lift anything even light objects. This will put your discs in a best vulnerable position to rupture and herniate.

5.) Sleep in a position that is painful for at least some part of your back or neck, like on your stomach with your arms above your head or underneath you, or on a saggy bed or couch. Don’t pay any attention to whether the bed is comfortable or not, do not put any pillows under your knees if on your back or between your knees if on your side.

6.) While talking on the phone, squeeze it for long periods of time between your ear and shoulder, or in hold it one hand for excessively long periods of time, preferably long enough for your arm to turn numb or starts spasming.

7.) When texting or using your laptop, be sure to hold it in your lap, so that your neck is bent down and sticking out as far as possible to be able to see it.

8.) At work, don’t take any breaks except smoke breaks.

9.) Even better is to chain smoke. Smoking is fabulous at causing and prolonging back pain!

10.) Every day, I want you to sit in a chair that is too big for you, where your feet don’t touch the ground and it has absolutely no low back support

11.) Wear 4-5 inch heels daily and walk long distances in them, even when your feet or back hurt, and remember, don’t stretch at all when you take those shoes off.

12.) Carry a heavy bag or purse on the same shoulder every day for as long as possible. Never clean out your purse because you want it to weight about 50 pounds if possible.

13.) When sitting, always cross the same leg over your other knee and lean into that side, sitting precariously only on one butt cheek. It also works to put a fat wallet (an inch thick if possible) into your back pocket, then sit on that every day for as many hours as possible.

14.) Place your computer monitor and printer off to the side of your desk, so you have to constantly twist your head and body to see them and to type

15.) Eat a total diet consisting of only sugar, processed food and fast food. Never eat fruits or vegetables. Do not drink water, instead, drink soda, juice, or red bulls, and definitely don’t take any supplements to fill in the gaps in your diet.

16.) Never exercise your body…..and make it your own personal goal to have the biggest beer belly amongst all your friends. Beer bellies are great for causing low back pain.

17.) NO stretching- even if your body feels like it. Just ignore your body and stay stiff.

18.) AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST: Never be adjusted by a chiropractor! They are experts at relieving back and neck pain. Or, if you must get adjusted, do it only when you’re in severe pain, dragging one leg or you can’t walk at all.

Just follow these simple suggestions and you too, can have neck and back pain!

Join Us October 9th!

If you want to learn 3 simple actions you can take to reduce your pain, join Dr. Deb Sampair in a fun, interactive, and entertaining workshop on October 9, 2018 from 6:30pm to 8:00pm!

Space is limited! RSVP online, call us at 408-371-0068 or email office@HOHChiropractic.com

REGISTER ONLINE

Join me next time for 5 easy ways to cause hip pain!

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